Busybodies and Backbiters

Now, we already saw this morning how that the how that the the disciples called this act of great devotion and sacrifice and and love toward the lord Jesus. They called it a waste. So, we’ve already seen that part of it and that really it says a lot about what the disciples. Now, I’m I’m gonna narrow down this this word disciples a little bit but this the the low view that these disciples had of Christ.

They they did not they were not speaking spiritually at all at this point. But what’s what one of the things that stuck out to me is I’ve I concentrated and just spent a little bit of time meditating not not really on the lord Jesus. Look, we did that this morning and not really on the woman although we did that this morning as well but let’s look this afternoon and focus our attention on the critics, the critics.

What’s interesting in this passage are the critics. Now, notice what it says in verse number eight, when his disciples saw it, they had indignation. What does that mean? What does it mean to be indignant? It’s anger. It’s anger. Now, this so this lady think this through with me. To me, this strikes me as very odd. Why would they be angry? This lady has taken this this 300, you know, 300p, you know, a very expensive ointment and has broken it and poured it out upon the head of Christ and they’re angry.

Now, it’s it’s interesting. They didn’t just it it’s not another word like bothered or you know, something like that but specifically, they’re angry. They’re angry and what what’s really odd to me is the fact that they’re angry given the fact that that ointment is not theirs. That was her, it’s not like she she like took it from the treasury of the disciples and decided to appropriate it and then do something, you know, that looked, you know, real religious and godly and make it seem that way. No, they’re angry over what she did with her own property.

Now does that is it just me or does that strike you as a little bit odd, a little bit funny? But in addition to their anger, and I think this is what the anger reveals, and this is the first thing I wanna point out to you, is there the fact that they get angry over what someone else does with her property shows that they are being busy bodies.

Busy bodies. The woman, now remember, it is not that the woman was doing anything wrong. In fact, they didn’t even allege that she was doing anything wrong or sinful. That wasn’t the question at all. Yet, they found they found cause and reason to criticize what someone else is doing that is not wrong with their own property, and that doing it unto Christ. There’s a problem there. Now, does it mean to be a busybody?

What does it mean to be a busybody? Look, let’s look at a first couple of verses. First Peter chapter four and first Thessalonians chapter four. Let’s look at first Peter first.

First Peter chapter four. This is just good old horse sense here. First Peter chapter four verse number verse number 15 says this, but let none of you suffer as a murderer or as a thief or as an evildoer or as a busybody in other men’s matters. As a busybody in other men’s matters. Look at first Thessalonians chapter four.

First Thessalonians chapter four verse number 11 or verse number 10, do you get the context? First Thessalonians four verse 10, and indeed ye do it toward all the brethren which are in all Macedonia, but we beseech you, brethren, that ye increase more and more, and that ye study to be quiet. Now the word study, to apply yourself to something. Study to be quiet, what are we talking about? Is it just a matter of what you say, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands as we commanded you. This is the opposite of being a busybody in other men’s matters. Is this not exactly what the what the what the disciples are doing? Now remember that oftentimes it is women who get a bad rap for being busybodies, right? That’s often associated with, you know, in in society and culture with with women. Women are all the time, whatever. You know, but it’s not women.

These are men. These are the disciples who are looking at what this lady is doing and with her own property, not theirs, that is obviously not wrong. It’s definitely not a matter of open like sin or wrongdoing and yet they’re finding a cause to intrude into business that has nothing to do with them and so the horse sense is this, the good old fashioned horse sense is this, it’s none of your business.

It was not their business at all what this woman was doing with her 300p of ointment. So, the very fact, it’s not even not even even if you don’t look at the criticism, you just set that aside whether it’s valid or invalid. The very fact that there is any criticism at all, that is in their mind at all, shows that they’re busy bodies. They’re judgy, examining other people’s not only what they do but their motivations for doing it even though that thing is no, there’s no wrong about it all. Now, it’d be one thing if she was doing something evil, because the Bible does tell us to judge righteous judgment. The Bible does does tell us to prove all things.

But what this lady is doing unto Christ with her own property is none of their business, disciples or not. And that’s the first thing I want you to see. It is not just ladies that have a problem with this, it’s men too. And I know recently I was talking to a lady in our church and we’re we were talking about a situation together and she just she said something. It was actually sister Judy Johnson. She said something about that situation and she just said, it’s none of their business. Nobody. It’s not it’s not related anybody here and but when she said that, it struck me like, you know, that’s just that’s just good old fashioned horse sense.

If it’s none of my business, why am I commenting at all? But yet, they did. And so as a good rule, if we’re not talking about right and wrong, and if we’re talking about something that’s has nothing to do with me, maybe the best course of action is to keep my opinion to myself, right? Because that’s what it means to be a busybody. Notice what it says, in other men’s matters.

See, that’s the key. Now, if it affects me, that’s different. But if it’s another person’s matters, then let them deal with it. We don’t Listen, there’s no reason that we have to even express our opinion in that matter. So that’s the first thing I want you to see, is these disciples were busy bodies. The second thing I want you to see is is, also in chapter 26, is that these disciples were backbiters, backbiters. So you got busy bodies, you got backbiters.

And essentially, what they did is maybe they didn’t directly slander this lady but what they did is they they didn’t so much criticize her motivations. That that’s not really discussed but they do criticize her actions. They criticize her actions. To be a backbiter means to detract from the character of, to slander, or to speak ill of. Now, are they doing this with a woman? Yes, they are. Now, they’re not directly criticizing necessarily saying that what she did was evil but what they’re they’re they’re essentially insulting her by saying, hey, you’re you’re not making the you’re not making the right choice here. You’re doing the wrong thing and kind of embarrassing her and kind of in that way slandering her name. That’s what that’s the definition of backbiting.

And again, these are the disciples. These are the men who follow who who follow Jesus. Now, here’s what we have to understand about backbiters and complainers. First of all, it wasn’t any of their business, number one. Number two, therefore, they shouldn’t have had they shouldn’t they shouldn’t even be expressing an opinion. Number three, they probably shouldn’t even have an opinion. Because the fact that they had an opinion about it shows that they are passing judgment on this lady and that without warrant. Proverbs 17 verse number 20 says this, he that hath a froward heart findeth no good.

He that hath a forward heart findeth no good and he that hath a perverse tongue falleth into mischief. Now, we know that the lord rebukes them. We’re gonna get to that in a minute. The lord rebukes them but when we look at this, we know that the lady, Mary is not doing anything wrong. In fact, what she’s doing is right. It’s actively right and good. Why then are they seeing evil where good is?

Why then are they seeing evil where good is? He that hath a froward heart findeth no good. It says, see it says more about these disciples than anything else. The fact that they saw evil where actually good was speaks volumes about the viewer. Just like if you had a, we we talked about this long time ago now but it’s just like if you had a pair of glasses on that were dirty.

If you put a pair of glasses on that are dirty, everything you see is dirty But the problem is not in everything you see, the problem is in your glasses. And that’s when you’re dealing with a complaining and a a backbiting spirit, the problem is inward, not at that thing about which we are complaining.

And so that’s why a complainer and a backbiter, that’s the core issue, is that it’s not about the thing, it’s about the fact that I’m complaining about it. Look at if you would at a few verses starting, Exodus chapter 23.

Exodus 23 verse one. Exodus 23 verse one. Thou shalt not raise a false report. Put not thine hand with the wicked to be an unrighteous witness. Thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil, neither shalt thou speak in a cause to decline after many to rest judgment. That’s what it means to backbite. Raise a false report. Put a shine a shine a cast this lady in an ugly light.

As if she had made the wrong decision as if this, as if what she did wasn’t wasn’t good. Even though it actually was purely good. But notice in verse number two of of Exodus 23, it says, thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil. Now, I’m going to come back to that in just a second. So, remember that part of the verse. Go to Titus chapter three.

Titus chapter three. Titus chapter three verse number one, the Bible says this, put them in mind to be subject to principalities and powers to obey magistrates obey magistrates, to be ready to every good work, to speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle showing all meekness unto all men. See that? To speak evil of no man.

This might be the most violated verse in Baptist churches right here. But it’s true, irrelevant. Did you know that even if somebody is doing something actually wrong, sinful, and wrong, that doesn’t mean we gotta talk about it, right? Right?

Look at James chapter four. How much less things that are not wrong? Like this case with this woman. Yet, just finding a reason that to criticize. James chapter four verse number Look if you would at verse number 11.

Speak not evil one of another, brethren. For he that speaketh evil of his brother and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law and judgeth the law, but if thou art, but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge. Very clear. Speak not evil one of another. Now, first Peter, look at first Peter chapter two.

Verse one. First Peter two verse one, wherefore, laying aside all malice and all guile and hypocrisies and envies. Man, so many of these verses are are in Matthew 26. You’ll see in a minute. And hypocrisies and envies and all, what does it say? Evil speaking. Evil speakings. Just because it’s true, doesn’t mean you have to say it. Just because it’s sinful, doesn’t mean you have to say it. Just because you have an opinion, doesn’t mean you have to say it.

See, it would be better for these disciples to just keep their opinion to themselves rather than to backbite against this lady and then reveal the fact that they’re by speaking it, they have revealed their their kind of critical attitude toward her. Now, the truth is they ought not, they should not have even had an attitude like that about her, but they did, but they did but the moment they spoke it, they removed all doubt.

Now, go back to Matthew if you would. Matthew 26, notice this Notice verse nine. They say, to what purpose is this waste for? Now, notice how notice how pious this sounds. Notice how religious. Notice how holy it sounds. For this ointment might have been sold for much and given to the poor. Isn’t that so sanctimonious? Is it so beautiful? See, we know the better thing to do. Instead of wasting it on Jesus, we could’ve done something good with it, right? That sounds very pious, doesn’t it? Sounds very religious, very righteous, and holy.

And so what these disciples also had is they had a while they’re literally with the same breath that they are sinfully criticizing a woman who is doing purely good. In that same breath, they are cloaking their sinful speech with a veneer of piety. They’re criticizing their sister, right, Mary. They’re criticizing her over something good that she’s doing, and they’re backbiting against her, they’re slandering her and complaining and gossiping, while at the same time wrapping it in a way that sounds spiritual and sounds religious. Does this sound familiar?

This is like Baptist 101 for how to gossip. Bless her heart. Pray for so and so. You know she ain’t, you know, she’s not been that, you know, yeah, that, I’m telling you that. Asking another person to pray for someone as a as a pretext to slander them is is evil.

You know, the best thing to do is to say, pray for so and so, period or pray for that person, yourself. You don’t have to speak it. You don’t have to speak it. But this veneer of piety giving to the poor.

I’m going there. I’m going there. You’re getting ahead of me. Two more things and we’ll be finished. Go to John chapter 12. John 12. I just wanna tell you brothers and sisters, listen.

We ought to do everything in our power not to speak evil of one another. And this is not just within the church, but in your personal life, with family, with friends, with coworkers. You ought to do everything in your power to try and keep your mouth closed.

Whether it’s true or not, whether you know it’s true or not, whether you have the opinion the same or not, as a rule, just keep it to yourself. And if you have an evil thought in your heart, take that to the Lord and say Lord help me to have better thoughts of this person. You know, if the disciples had just done that, that would have solved it.

They have an evil opinion of her, which led to the evil words they spoke of her but really the core and the the root of it is, lord, give me a better opinion of this person and you know what that goes back to? Does anybody know what the the the the medicine for that is? It’s love.

Love toward that person is what will chase out the evil thought that leads to the backbiting. But notice in in John chapter 12 verse four. Then saith one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, now we know him, Simon’s son, which should betray him. Why was not this ointment sold for 300p and given to the poor? Ah, now we know something. What Matthew and Mark called the disciples because they were involved was actually instigated by Judas Iscariot.

That’s that’s revealing, is it not? So in in this instance, there’s an evil influence. There’s an evil influence. All of the disciples criticized her, but in John 12, we see Judas that Judas was the ringleader.

But others followed Judas in criticizing her. Judas suggested the money would be better spent on the poor. And by by Judas being the ringleader, he’s revealing that he valued money and the poor, so called poor, more than Jesus, which is what we talked about this morning, but notice what it says in verse number six. This he said, not that he cared for the poor. You know what that is? That’s that veneer of piety I was talking about a minute ago.

So he said the words about the poor as if he cared for them, but he didn’t. You see, that’s what I’m talking about. But because he was a thief and had the bag and bear what was put therein. So, she had dropped $46 into the bag, he would have a huge slush fund to what to to brother Joseph’s point. He would have had a huge slush fund that he could’ve that he could’ve skimmed and go get the things he had been wanting.

See how that works? It’s rotten underneath. Now, here’s what I want you to see though. We expect that from somebody wicked like Judas though though do we not? Judas Iscariot? But see how he has influenced Matthew, John, James, and Peter, and Bartholomew, Judas, the other Judas, Simon Zelodes, right? Thomas, and these men are godly men. They love Jesus, right? They’re they’re true followers. They’re not fakers. I mean, right?

These men are godly men. They love Jesus and yet they’ve been influenced. By a wicked voice among them. So, you can see who is driving and influencing the backbiters and really and this is a sad feature in a church, in a setting like that, this is the disciples which is like, you know, the first church, if you will.

And among them, there was a guy who was actually for the devil, who wasn’t a believer, and yet he was named among them, the mixed multitude we might say. It was the ungodly hiding among the godly and here’s now, the ungodly hiding among the godly were actually negatively affecting the godly and so now, the other disciples are criticizing this woman at the instigation of this ungodly man among them but what should they have been doing?

That’s why I would mention Exodus 23. We read verse two, and it says, thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil. You know what should have been happening? Is those disciples should have been should have been standing up against Judas and instead of going along with that evil influence, there should have been godly men who are not going to simply passively stand by and go along with an evil influence upon the godly but they would stand for righteousness even when that evil influence is coming from a corner that sounds religious.

That there there should have been disciples say, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah. Look what, who is she doing this to? This is Jesus for crying out loud. But they were joining. When was somebody gonna stand up and say, mm-mm, I don’t wanna hear it. You you you’re backbiting, you’re tearing their name down, you’re slandering them. How do you, do you know that’s true? And even if it is, do you do you need to be telling me that?

Why would you have this thought? I don’t see, I don’t see why they’re doing that. You you think they’re doing this for the, you think they’re doing that for this reason or that, how do you know? Push back. That’s what we need. You see, the way to fix a problem of of backbiting and slander is to have some godly person saying, I’m not listening to it. I’m not putting up with it.

Even if it’s true, I don’t wanna hear it. It gets real awkward, does it not? It gets real awkward, but that’s exactly what Exodus says to do. It says, thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil. And not only that, the best proof of that is in here, is in our text in Matthew 26. Notice what it says.

Verse 10. When Jesus understood it, he said unto them, why trouble ye the woman? For she hath wrought a good work on upon me. You know what Jesus did? He did the very thing, the very thing the scripture said to do. He heard gossip about this woman and he stood up and he said, oh no. No. I’m not going to stand by passively while you slander her name for something good she’s doing. I’m not gonna let you judge her motives.

No, she’s doing a good thing. You see, he refused to be influenced. Now, mean, I know you say, well, he’s Jesus. Well, I get that but as an example to us, he’s refusing to be influenced here.

And see, that will kill this kind of backbiting. Remember, this woman is doing right. Again, backbiting is so often about the person speaking it. It is as often about the person speaking it as the thing supposedly that was done. That’s why we need godly people, men and women, that’ll say, you know, I know about that. And besides, I don’t really want to hear that.

And not let that influence, that evil influence affect us because it will. We’ll get something in our mind and it’ll darken our view of that person And now we have an issue, listen to how this works. And now we have an issue about someone that hasn’t done us wrong at all.

And even in that original case where someone, where it was like you heard someone or thought someone or whatever, and that person was involved in other men’s matters. In other words, it didn’t it didn’t even affect them directly either. But they have taken it and passed it on to you and to me, and we’ve listened and now it’s darkened our view of that person. Now we’re two people removed from the actual issue.

And when in fact the person wasn’t doing anything wrong in this case. Now, they might have been, but it’s really irrelevant to the point. The last thing I want you to see though is that this is not a victimless crime. The one person that we don’t talk about or think about in this passage, we talked about Jesus, We talked about the disciples. But what about the woman?

You know what this woman is doing? She is pouring out with pure heart and pure motive. Listen now. She is pouring out the most valuable thing she has upon the head of Christ with a pure heart and a pure motive. How do we know that? Jesus told us. She is doing 100% the right thing.

And yet, she’s being criticized and her actions are being slandered and her motives are being impugned. How does that affect her? How discouraging would it be to you if you were trying to serve Jesus with all your heart and yet people were impugning your motives and your actions behind your back.

That could have an effect on her. And that can definitely discourage a saint of God who’s trying to live for God. So it’s not just about the person who’s backbiting, it’s not just about the person who’s listening, it’s also about when it comes back around to the person who is the subject of the matter.

Have any of you ever been the subject of that kind of stuff? That is no fun. And then you start quite, well, maybe I did something wrong. That could be a very discouraging thing to think that the people who loved you and are supposed to care for you are the ones who, see, that should never be. That should never be.

These disciples should have been there saying, oh no, Judas because they had no idea of Judas which we’ll see later but they had no idea about Judas and who he was but they should’ve been, there should’ve been disciples saying, hold on now.

What this woman is doing is an act of love upon Jesus. And you can’t count, you can’t calculate devotion like this in dollars and cents, Judas. You don’t have any grounds to say what you’re saying. Just drop it. Just drop it. Hopefully, we can take this negative example and apply some principles, maybe some guidelines in our life to help us in a way that would preserve the spirit of love in our family, among our friends, in our work, of course in our church by seeing the influence that was influencing these disciples. Let’s pray together.